Holy Frontal Area Batman!

"My bird IS the word" (mybirdistheword) 12/05/2018 at 11:40 • Filed to: None

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Why does it need to be this big? it’s not like the engines have gotten any bigger. Is this chevrolet acknowledging that truck buyers are all in a dick measuring contest?

Also this reminds me of the 70-73 mustang mach one. I can’t find any good pictures (since you can’t really tell unless it’s in person) but the dash and hood line comes up to your neck when sitting. I’m sure if you asked Reidus he would vouch for me.

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RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 11:51

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Yesterday I was making comparison to mid-70s heavy tractor class Chevies, but today I’ll accuse it of looking like an old Step Van, for variety.

and 100 more > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 11:52

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Is this chevrolet acknowledging that truck buyers are all in a dick measuring contest?

They kinda banking on it at this point...

My bird IS the word > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 12/05/2018 at 11:55

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My bird IS the word > and 100 more 12/05/2018 at 11:57

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Seriously. Just buy a deuce-and-a-half already.

Although I am seriously considering a milsurp humvee when I move out so who am I to judge?

jasmits > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 11:57

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BLARG BLARG BLARG MY TRUCK IS BIGGER THAN YOURS BLARG BLARG BLARG

Idk that’s what pops into my head when i see the front fascia. 

My bird IS the word > jasmits 12/05/2018 at 11:59

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When I had the mini, guys like that would park next to it all the time. I’m not kidd ing.

Galileo Humpkins (aka MC Clap Yo Handz) > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 12:04

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I can’t wait to see this following aggressively at a distance of about 2 feet in my rear view mirror when Mr. Overcompensator can simply get in the left lane and pass becaue 70 in a 55 middle lane isn’t good enough for him.

Svend > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 12:05

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What you guys call trucks are starting to look like what we call trucks over here.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 12:06

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The problem isn’t that it doesn’t look like a GM product. The problem is that it looks like a lesser son of some very, very dopey fathers.

My bird IS the word > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 12/05/2018 at 12:08

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Jesus that GMC in the middle.....

My bird IS the word > Svend 12/05/2018 at 12:10

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Give it time. The new chevy silverado 2050

gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 12:10

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. “ Is this chevrolet acknowledging that truck buyers are all in a dick measuring contest?”

Yes

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 12:10

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A dick measuring contest is literally all that it is.

Dead serious. They make a bunch of noise about cooling area, but then you find out that GM’s been putting actively controlled shutter flaps behind the grill on all the big stuff for several years now because the massive grilles provided too much cooling.

Totally serious.

My bird IS the word > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks 12/05/2018 at 12:14

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Nah, cause a thermostat, that made too much sense.

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 12/05/2018 at 12:14

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Why not a GMC Kodiak/Chevrolet K6500?

... oh. Right. Because they actually reintroduced those.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 12:16

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On the one hand, “headlights under giant grill” is a weird and fucked up thing. On the other hand, it looks like nothing else on the road, so there’s that. I know where somebody has two dump trucks of that vintage.

user314 > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 12:17

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Does Chevy not realize the ‘ Canyonero’ was created to mock truck/SUV manufactures, not to give them ideas?

Svend > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 12:24

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I’m imagining the next boardroom meetings,

John, ‘what if like on motorbikes where the rider sits on top of the engine. We put the cab further forward so it’s on top of the engine ?’

Simon, ‘like a truck-truck?’

John, ‘er, no, like a motorbike because you know how some riders say they like having a larger thundering weapon between their legs when they talk to women , well our custom ers will be able to say the same and it’ll help their little winkie issue’

Simon, ‘as I said, like a truck-truck!’

John, ‘Well okay, if you want but I think we’ll stick with putting it to the customer my way’.

.

.

John, ‘oh and then we can start on the load bed, that’ll make them brag about how much they can carry (though they probably still won’t actually carry anything) and how big their bed is. get it Simon? How big their bed is, like a house bed, but on a truck, hee hee’.

Simon, ‘Er John, I think I know exactly what your saying, but you know they already exist.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks 12/05/2018 at 12:25

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I like how the doubled-style headlights and grill bar on the second make it look like a raised/tall-cab international/freightliner/Ford, while not otherwise having the good reason to look that way that the others have.

The International may have come in two cab heights, I’m not sure. The freightliner definitely did, and the lower grill on tall ones is actually attached to the chassis.

The Ford H is the same cab as a C-series with no headlights mounted in the “main” body and a lift/filler body below.

My bird IS the word > Svend 12/05/2018 at 12:27

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I think GM board meetings are just a bunch of car salesman sitting in a circle slapping the roof of whatever new product is out.

If I cared I’d photoshop that.

Nibbles > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks 12/05/2018 at 12:33

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Everyone is doing active shutters b ecause cooling is too efficient when unloaded. Those shutters don’t run when in tow/haul mode for good reason.

Svend > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 12:33

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I suspect their boardroom might be like what my boardroom looked like when I worked for local government.

When out for lunch and taking a bit longer and someone from the office phoned me, I could honestly say, I was in the boardroom.

RallyDarkstrike - Fan of 2-cyl FIATs, Eastern Bloc & Kei cars > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 12:34

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“Why does it need to be this big? it’s not like the engines have gotten any bigger. Is this chevrolet acknowledging that truck buyers are all in a dick measuring contest?”

They’re just trying to match Ford’s incredibly ugly Super Duty.

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > Nibbles 12/05/2018 at 12:35

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And exactly how many of those people buying 1500's, Suburbans, and Escalades are towing on a regular basis, much less at even half the rated capacity?

Uh- huh.

Also I guess every truck without them in the past 20+ years has either been too cold when not towing or too hot when towing despite all evidence to the contrary?

gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 12:39

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I mock this , but then think of my redneck cousin who will probably fall in love with it. 

facw > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 12:51

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Someone actually starred one of my comments in this article the other day:

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Nibbles > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks 12/05/2018 at 13:28

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Do you honestly believe that these companies build the trucks to meet the needs of those you listed, without giving thought to those who actually use the product for their intended purpose?

Lets do talk about the past 20 years. I’m going to thoroughly enjoy this. Take a look at this chart I made

You’ll notice that, over a twenty year span, the output on diesels have effectively doubled, with the biggest jump between 2010 and 2015 . We all know that more power means more heat. More heat in what is essentially the same package throughout those 20 years.

What do you think engineers would do when they’re posed with the con undrum of “how do we remove all this excess heat when we are size constrained?”

If you guessed Build trucks with massive-ass cooling systems and let the designers deal with the rest , then you’re right!

Now what do you figure happens when designers are handed this truck, whose dimensions have remained relatively unchanged over the last few generations, but have these massive-ass cooling systems ?

Well they’re certainly not going to say “we can’t package this, send it back” because the cooling system team would then say “we can’t cool this, send it back” and the powertrain engineers would then say “we can’t provide this output without the cooling, send it up” and THE BUSINESS would say “well we will get 950 lb/ft, send it down” and the powertrain engineers would say “we can’t do 950 without proper cooling, send it out ” and the cooling system team would then say “we have to have this massive-ass cooling system to maintain that output, send it out” and the designers would say “welp, THE BUSINESS says do it, so let’s do it. Then it goes to market with an undersized cooling system, and trucks blow up.

I imagine they’d say “ guess we’re gonna put these big-ass grilles on the trucks to meet the duty cycle. But what about when it’s not needed? Send it up!” Then the cooling system folks say “well, if it’s not needed 100% of the time, but we need to provide for it at duty, let’s put these shutters in. They’ll help retain heat when the engine isn’t over x load and increase fuel economy by a slight margin. Win win?” Then everyone else says “Win win!”. And THE BUSINESS gets their truck with the numbers they want.

xyzabc > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 13:30

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COE (Cab-O ver-Engine) Truck Styling  is the new Rock & R oll.

BahamaTodd > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 13:35

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It probably doesn’t have to be that large, but the necessary cooling also has to do with the power output and capability ratings. The engine size hasn’t changed much but their output and capabilities have seriously increased .   These trucks have to be robust enough to tow 30k lbs up a high % grade on a hot day.

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > Nibbles 12/05/2018 at 14:08

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Which, whether or not you like it, is all shit I know. Probably as well as you if not better.

But guess what?

Those are the shutters for a Cadillac Escalade built on the GMT K2XX platform using the 6.2 L86 gas engine. You can’t get any other engine in it. So, no, it’s not what you claim it is here. The L86 is a generation V small block, derived from the L92/L9H. And i t’s a modified LT1.

Seems the Corvette C7 does just fine despite making more power. (The Z06's notorious for going into limp mode use the LT4 which is supercharged.)

The predecessor GMT900 platform with the L92/L9H only makes very slightly less power - down 15HP and 30ft/lbs.

But the grille area from the GMT900 to GMT K2XX? Well, photos say it all.

First, a LWB Escalade ESV, which requires increased cooling due to it’s significant increase in weight.

And now the GMT K2XX SWB.

And now, for insult to injury... here is the 2013 GMC 3 500 HD. It is equipped with the LML Duramax 6.6L making 397HP and 765ft/lbs at 1600RPM.

Here is the 2019 GMC 3 500 HD. It is equipped with... the exact same LML Duramax 6.6L making 397HP and 765ft/lbs .

Same engine. Same chassis (GMT K2XX .) The newer one is lighter. Yet it has, eh, call it about twice as much square footage of grille. Oh, and that GMC badge? In the past 10 years it has grown to truly absurd size. How absurd? Again, we let the photos do the talking.

Truck grilles as penis surrogates confirmed, I’d say.

BigBlock440 > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks 12/05/2018 at 15:03

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You know what they started doing between 2013 and 2019?  Testing to J2807, which requires, you guessed it, MOAR COOLING!

Mercedes Streeter > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks 12/05/2018 at 15:44

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Goddammit. They brought back my favourite type of GM truck only to make it look like that.

I’ve always had a soft spot for the TopKick/Kodiak. I’ve always felt the van cab went so well with the design.

wkiernan > My bird IS the word 12/05/2018 at 17:53

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Gawd, the ‘70s Mach I. When I was in hi-skool my buddy’s father had one of those - automatic transmission, of course - and I drove it a couple of times. What a terrible piece of crap it was, slow, noisy and bad-handling, and I still remember the absolutely terrible visibility out of it. To the sides and back you were almost per fect ly blind, and even looking straight ahead you could hardly see anything.

My bird IS the word > wkiernan 12/05/2018 at 22:10

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It is sexy though.

My bird IS the word > facw 12/05/2018 at 22:14

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As far as I’m concerned it is one of the highest ridiculousness/dollar factor out there right now. Plus, people on this site like far, far more terrible cars than a humvee.